A Philosophy For Life

When scrolling through X (formerly Twitter), I usually hunt for juicy financial, economic, or political information that will inspire a newsletter piece.

Last night, I came across a person I had never met who wrote the most immediately helpful thread I’ve ever seen. This thread was so brilliant that I created a bookmark list called “Best Advice” so I would never lose it. I knew right away that I must share it with you. But before I do, let’s meet our contestants.

Tim Denning, a blogger with 77,000 followers, published the list I’m about to show you from Kevin Kelly, a confidante of Tim Ferriss. I didn’t know who Denning or Kelly was, but I’m a big fan of Tim Ferriss. I found all of Ferriss’ books helpful.

Kevin Kelly is one of Tim’s friends and is, in his own right, an excellent writer and futurist. He is the founding executive editor of Wired magazine. His chapter in Ferriss’ Tool of Titans didn’t hit me that hard when I read it. Now, I think the man is a genius. After you read this, you’ll probably feel the same way.

Now, let’s delve into Kevin Kelly’s unique philosophy of life, a perspective that is sure to intrigue you.

1. “Don’t take it personally when someone turns you down. Assume they are like you: busy, occupied, distracted. Try again later.”

Right off the bat, we’ve got a huge winner. Jim Camp, of negotiation fame, wants his clients or negotiating adversaries to say “No.” That way, he knew where the negotiation boundaries were. When you’re always trying to “get to yes,” you’re not living in your client’s world. You’re living in your world. But more than that, you become more tenacious when you get used to hearing no. There’s always something more to talk about. And that’s how deals get done. Indeed, try again later.

2. “Over the long term, the future is decided by optimists.”

My good friend, colleague, and Paradigm’s options expert Alan Knuckman constantly hammers me with this. And I must admit, he’s right. It’s changed my way of thinking when it comes to trading and investing. I’m not as jittery. I have faith that things will turn out alright. Now, that doesn’t mean you should ignore danger signs. But it does mean you probably won’t overreact to bad news. That’s an essential skill when the U.S. markets tend to go up over time. It would have been a different story if we had been in Japan over the last 35 years.

3. “The purpose of a habit is to remove that action from self-negotiation.”

Think of it like this: a habit is an algorithm. The point of creating one is to automate a process. If you do something enough times, your mind automates it into a habit. Then you don’t have to “decide” to do it anymore. Decision fatigue is a huge energy suck. Now, you can create the habits you want by repeating positive actions and turning them into uplifting algorithms that’ll happen like magic.

4. “Perhaps the most counter-intuitive truth of the universe is that the more you give to others, the more you’ll get.”

Imagine. Manifest. Share. That’s the magic formula. Everyone imagines. We all daydream about how things could be. Some take that forward by manifesting whatever that product or service is. We physically bring it from the inside to the outside of our heads, from our brains to the real world. Then, we share, sell, or barter what we made with other people. The more you do that, the more you’ll get.

5. “You don’t want to be famous.”

Luckily, I got this one early. I always wondered why people wanted other people to follow them around snapping pictures all the livelong day.

Kelly suggests reading the biography of any famous person. You may not like what you read.

Kelly also says you can’t hit the reset button once you have fame. The attention you should seek should be from your loved ones, not some strangers in a parking lot snapping pictures of you.

6. “Most amazing or great things are done by people doing them for the first time.”

If you’re running a business, Kevin thinks you should hire people based on their natural abilities and then train them for the skills needed to be good at the job. If their mindset is right (growth), the rest is teachable.

7. “Almost anything money can do, friends can do better. In so many ways, a friend with a boat is better than owning a boat.”

Hear! Hear! Money is great, but what you can experience with the boys, girls… or posse… is much better than counting the gold in your vault. Your “stuff” won’t matter in your dying hours, but your friends and memories will.

8. “Being enthusiastic is worth 25 IQ points.”

I’d add, “Being a Negative Nancy is worth minus 25 IQ points.” Enthusiasm makes you optimistic, and we talked about that above. But being negative closes your mind to the possibilities. So, find a way to get excited about your project, whatever that is. Or get another project.

9. “Pros are just amateurs who know how to recover from their mistakes gracefully.”

It took Edison 10,001 attempts to make the lightbulb work. What did he say about that? “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” That’s enthusiasm, optimism, and grace all in one quote. Even if you favor Nikola Tesla, this advice is worth hanging on the wall.

10. “Eat beans and rice for a year.”

This is his most unique piece of advice. Kevin says this because “any time you have to risk something in the future, you won’t be afraid of the worst-case scenario.” I remember quitting my broking job in London in 2006. The first thing I bought at Tesco, my local supermarket, was a can of Heinz beans. It tasted fine, and I knew I’d be alright.

11. “When crisis and disaster strike, don’t waste them.”

Without problems, there would be no creation or solutions. Learn to thrive on problems, to welcome them. Every time you solve a problem, you get better.

12. “Finite games are played to win or lose. Infinite games are played to keep the game going. Seek out infinite games cause they yield unlimited rewards.”

This is why you quit your job to run an online business. The goal is freedom, not money. You stay in the game longer than trying to hang on to a job by your fingernails.

13. “Your behavior, not your opinions, will change the world.”

It’s all about what you do, not what you say. That’s why merit-based systems thrive.

14. “The greatest teacher is called ‘doing.’”

Get kinesthetic, baby! Take things apart and put them back together again. Hilariously, I’m not allowed to convert my driver’s license here, so I’ve got to do the whole course, including the theory, with eighteen-year-old kids. You know what? I love it. I’m learning all about cars, which they didn’t make me learn in New Jersey in the early 90s. I know an albero del motore is Italian for “crankshaft.” I’m learning to speak Italian better because I have to take this class. Watching videos isn’t always the best way to learn.

15. “Your growth as a mature being is measured by the number of uncomfortable conversations you are willing to have.”

I once knew a Wall Street managing director who got drunk before he told his number one he wasn’t getting a promotion this year. He couldn’t bear to have the conversation. His underling decided to stay home the next few days and not come to work. Then, he vowed never to work for that MD again. Those drinks cost the MD $500,000 because his bosses were so incensed they took it out of his hide.

Master discomfort. Know what it feels like. Accept it. And then do it anyway.

16. “Very few regrets in life are about what you did. Almost all are about what you didn’t do.”

My million-dollar mistake was not buying a flat in London in the early 2000s. My billion-dollar mistake was not buying Bitcoin when my crazy libertarian friends told me to. Sure, I’m not proud of some of the things I’ve done, but those things don’t keep me up at night.

17. “When you die, you take absolutely nothing with you except your reputation.”

I watched the podcast Inside of You with Michael Rosenbaum a few months ago. His guest was John Rhys-Davies, who played Sallah in the Indiana Jones films. He shared a thoughtful anecdote. Rhys-Davies was teaching an acting class and asked the class who Sir Laurence Olivier was. No one raised a hand. Then someone sheepishly asked, “Was he a writer?” Rhys-Davies said, “If they don’t know who Olivier is, what chance do they have of remembering me?” He knew he had been right to put his energy into his family.

Wrap Up

I hope you found that as helpful as I did. It’s a list to live by.

Have a wonderful long weekend. You deserve it!