I have discovered that I am never, ever too drunk not to be instantly angry at the mere mention of the neo-Keynesian halfwit morons who are, despite mountains of evidence proving its complete failure, still clinging to that same, silly meth-based economic theory which I originally meant to write as “same, silly math-based economic theory” but, due to a typo, came out as “same, silly meth-based economic theory.”
“Meth-based economic theory” is, of course, an accident of the keyboard, now that I think about it, but the horrors of methedrine addiction and overdoses are probably much more descriptive, and would have more impact, than the terrific editorial cartoon I had just drawn, where I had depicted an old, ugly dog, which was obviously a Frankenstein-monster that had been reanimated after being stitched together out of pieces of various other dogs, and it had bare electrical wires leading to its ugly, misshapen head, and they were making sputtering noises like “Zzzzt! Zzzzzzzzzzzt” as sparks flew spectacularly through the air, which turned into equations to indicate that this hideous monster was, indeed, math-driven.
The “dog” in the cartoon was cleverly labeled “The Economy”, and it was precariously and ineffectually straddling a toilet seat, trying to take a crap in the toilet, but ended up getting it all over the bathroom and all over itself, instead.
The point of the cartoon was not, despite opinions to the contrary, about how I seem to be fixated on the lowest form of excrement-laden bathroom-humor that I defend as perfectly befitting my opinion about the Federal Reserve creating so much money that we will be destroyed by inflation in consumer prices, but about how, when you examine the cartoon itself, it shows all the neo-Keynesian quacks, like Ben Bernanke and Paul Krugman, standing around in the background celebrating their grand achievement, slapping each other on the back and shouting excitedly, “It craps all over everything!”
Of course, this fabulous pictorial allegory of mine brings up many, many questions, such as the popular, “What in the hell are you talking about?”
The answers to the questions are all the wrong answers, of course, as in some kind of Zen-like paradox, and just between us, there was nothing in the cartoon about accumulating as much gold, silver and oil as you can, which was an oversight on my part, a mistake made crystal clear by the remarkable swings in the stock markets, up and then down, then down and up, up then down, swooshing and sluicing around and around, which has a kind of rock-n-roll beat that belies its true, horrific nature, which is that these kinds of oscillations are ominous, and they remind me of how systems of flows, particularly ones being supplied with more and more energy like the Obama administration is adding more and more money to the economic system, often go chaotic and collapse in catastrophe soon after entering such periods of wild instability.
I notice such things because I happen to be an expert on instability, as I’m a guy whose Whole Freaking Life (WFL) is, in retrospect, one chaos after another, like being forced to give up my whole life and lifestyle, to go to work, to earn money, to support myself and my stupid family, who are doing nothing to help me by, you know, likewise going to work and earning some money, and then having the wife yell at me in loud exasperation, “They can’t work! They’re only children, and it is illegal to make them work, you heartless moron!”
And when I mention it to my own mother to, you know, get a second opinion, she sits there shaking her head in disbelief and saying, “I can’t believe I raised such a monster!” I am trying to explain, “But look at the gain if it had paid off!” but to no avail.
And when you politely ask your wife why doesn’t she get her fat butt into a nice job and maybe pull a little of the financial load around here, she rudely answers, “And who would take care of the children, you moron?” and then she looks at me, like I can think of somebody.
But I already thought of putting our money into gold, silver and oil to capitalize on the idiocy of government monstrously deficit spending and the insanity of the Federal Reserve creating the mountains of money to do so.
So I tell her, “I have saved us, and I will make us rich with my timely action to buy gold, silver and oil, and that should be enough to ask of me, and you should grovel at my feet instead of demanding I give you the remote control for the TV!” which, I quickly found out, was, in her opinion, not.
But I do, and either way, buying gold, silver and oil is so obvious, and are so fortuitously still ludicrously under-priced, that she’ll soon change her tune, and she, too, will exclaim, “Whee! This investing stuff is easy!”
The Mogambo Gurufor The Daily Reckoning
Richard Daughty (Mogambo Guru) is general partner and COO for Smith Consultant Group, serving the financial and medical communities, and the writer/publisher of the Mogambo Guru economic newsletter, an avocational exercise to better heap disrespect on those who desperately deserve it. The Mogambo Guru is quoted frequently in Barron's, The Daily Reckoning , and other fine publications. For podcasts featuring the Mogambo, click here.
Mogambo, you must be drunk! I love it. Can I get a job at Smith Consultant Group? We could have some wild lunches.
Honestly, I felt relief today at the 3% stock market drop. I’ve been so tense waiting for the crash(es) to happen. If it closes below 10,000 again on Monday, I’m shorting the S&P 500. And once those Flight-To-Safety Morons (FTSM’s) figure out our Treasury bonds are as valuable as Greece’s bonds, I’ll short them too.
Oh yeah, I’m in Gold and Silver, but I haven’t figured out the oil part yet.
Keep drinking heavily and heaping disrespect on those who desperately deserve it.
“…I felt relief today at the 3% stock market drop.”
then you should be ecstatic by the close Tuesday
We disagree on at least two fronts: I drink red wine and you probably drink beer.
Economics or finance are not sciences, not because of the millions of Mathematically Incompetent Dudes (MID), but beacuse it has as a main component the Huge Human Stupidity Factor (HHSF), which is hard to model mathematically.
One problem with bad math and MIDs is that
they beleve Black-Scholes et al, which in turn ignore fundamentals.
It’s easy to believe that all is random motion. Cheers!
J A, are you a government bureaucrat or a politician by any chance?
Its been a long time since last time I put my two cents. This time It would be oil. Here some life observation which I call the circle(s) of oil. Oil price is not a straight forward function of consumption and currency value. It is very much balanced and subjectively influenced system. From historical prospective, oil shocks of 1970s cause consumer to switch to lighter cars with smaller engines and turn down a thermostats in their homes. As exploration increased and demand tuned down, oil started multiyear decline. This cycle takes almost 10 years – 5 years to ditch existing gas guzzler once it runs it natural life, and another 5 years to decide if to stick to the smaller car as a primary transportation, as that car coming to its natural end… We are in the middle of this kind of cycle now, and consumption will only go down from there on. If you look at the list of engine for worldwide manufacturer VW you will see any size of engine from 1.2 liter to 1.8. this is the future of cars now. So, how come we found ourselves surrounded by SUVs in 1990s?
More of the economical and historical nonsense then anything else. As everyone knows, US government trying to suppress inflation. To make a long story short the main way of inflation suppression was, and is lies. From this standpoint oil simply fail to be adjusted for inflation, as inflation deemed nonexistent.
Another two cents about inflation. Everyone from Obama to Bernanke, to Geitner would be delighted to see genuine inflation. Instead of that they simply spending money to feed and house bunch of unemployed people for another day. In economy saturated by debt, every dollar above absolutely necessary expenses goes into debt payment. This way people keep roof over their head, businesses pay off loans, banks getting to repay government money. And as banks not compelled to lend (and maybe rightfully so), the cycle of debt is ruptured. Unless the government will start to pump money in the spirited way, say like giving each graduate $50k to boot, or tripling Social security benefits, no one would see an honest inflation (as no one would see any genuine grows). And we have a wonderful political system which would rather get us through 25 year slump then inflate away (I would not argue they have right to do so). As much as it is argued in the modern time, inflation is the product of better times. The setup of the economy where rich are getting richer caused the problem, as rich did not have anywhere to put their money. They methodically inflated cars(Lincoln Navigator or Caddy Escalade?), equities (P/E 100 anyone?), houses(3000, 4000,5000 sq ft?). The only mountain rich fail to conquer is a mountain of debt. Debt stopped the inflation in its tracks. People, who paying oversized mortgages and student loans cannot any more inflate anything around. This function is relayed now to the rich in the other parts of the world. Those that not saddled by debt just yet. At least for now…
When you've got a room full of 200 oil insiders scratching their heads at current high prices, something's gotta give.
For most investors, it’s weird to think of stocks as their go-to investing option.
The petropoly has bills to pay and setting the price of oil was a simple way to balance their budgets.
Investors don’t seem to care that what's propping up their investments is what will ultimately destroy them: government monetary policy.
For the next decade the energy revolution will be likely confined to the US, displaying the robustness of American entrepreneurship.
Why the Sage of Baltimore’s commentary persists through America’s changing times.
After attending Platt’s oil conference in London I want to relay two important themes you need to know.