The Continuing Argument Over Fiscal Policy

I note that a article reported that Jean-Claude Trichet – whom I refer to as “socialist moron Keynesian euro-trash halfwit,” but which everyone else refers to as European Central Bank President – is said to have said, while “speaking on behalf of the world’s central bankers,” that “the global economy has recovered better than expected, boosting inflation pressures in emerging markets.” Hahaha!

What Mr. Trichet literally said is that, “It’s clear that it is extremely important that we all keep control of inflation expectations, and that calls for appropriate decisions,” which is actually a relief, because I hate it when something is extremely important, yet not in control, like when my wife is so mad at me about something that is, apparently, extremely important, yet her anger is so uncontrolled in that she is stammering in rage “You…you…you…!”

And if I try to help her by asking, “What in the hell are you stammering about, now?” oddly enough, she gets worse! And her eyes kind of bug out, too! I mean, I can’t win here!

You can see the kind of crap that I have to put up with all the time!

And it doesn’t get any better with this Trichet character, either, as he says that it is clear, and that it is extremely important, to “keep control of inflation expectations” which, in this case, is apparently achieved by saying lying, stupid things like how the economy has recovered “better than expected,” which is only true if you expected the world to erupt in anarchist flames where everything gets destroyed in a hyperinflationary catastrophic bankruptcy that sweeps around the world while flying saucers invade the Earth and enslave us all, or Democrats invade the Earth and enslave us all, one’s as bad as the other, probably.

And so, explains Mr. Trichet, the “recovery,” which is better than expected, is why price inflation is up!  Hahaha!

And the lie of a recovering economy makes it suddenly OK that the poor, and everyone else, for that matter, slip a little closer to starvation because rising prices for food and energy consumes all their income?

What kind of crazy, demonic government is that? The same kind as America has, that’s what kind! Hahaha!

And that – that! – is why I am a proud Tea Party member who wishes us the best, and who laments the fact that it is Far, Far Too Late (FFTL) to do anything, like a car going 90 miles an hour sailing off a cliff after careening crazily down a perilous and steep mountain road.

As the car sails though the air, two guys inside are arguing, one saying, “More spending!” and the other saying, “Less taxes!”

Now, there are those that do not understand that such examples of Real Mogambo Humor (RMH) are very, very subtle, and thus not suited to the masses, who do not see the glaring, obvious connection between comparative economic virtues of more spending or less taxes and the prospect of a speeding car going over a cliff and smashing onto the rocks below, everyone inside screaming in fear all the way down, until the sudden stop kills everyone in a horrible, gruesome death milliseconds before the car bursts into flames, destroying everything, including whatever the car landed upon, probably an endangered species of some kind, or somebody’s mailbox, which aren’t cheap.

And when people gather around to see what happened, they will ask, “What happened?”  If they did, then I would tell them that two guys in the car went over a cliff because they were arguing about fiscal policy when they should have been, instead, in total agreement to complain about the Federal Reserve creating so freakishly much money!”

If I did, I am sure that they would look at me with those same blank looks of incomprehension and befuddled stupefaction that are on the faces of the people in the security video that shows I am peacefully standing in line, waiting for a cashier, and I am exercising my First Amendment rights by passing the time saying to the cashiers as I waited, “Take your time, morons! The longer you wait to ring up my sale, the utility of my purchase is still new and undiminished, even as my money becomes more worthless, losing purchasing value with every tick of the clock – tick tock, tick tock, tick tock! –  because the foul Federal Reserve is creating $100 billion of new money Per Freaking Month (PFM)!”

I expected, as I always expect, someone to say, “Well said! Well said, handsome, intelligent stranger to whom the bewildering world of economics seems but children’s toys!”

Well, they didn’t. So you can see on the video where I tell them, “The Federal Reserve is creating money out of thin air so that the corrupt government can borrow the money and spend it, which increases the money supply, which distorts everything, leading to weird bubbles and busts, mostly busts, fads and flops, mostly flops, and inflation, inflation, inflation that is going to eat you alive!”

This is when the security video shows the security guard coming over and asking me to leave, which I do, but not before saying, in my most melodramatic Mogambo eloquence and with a theatrical dismissive wave of my arm, “You have been warned, earthlings!”

It’s too bad that the video does not have a sound track, and thus there is no official record of my voice trailing off into the distance, saying, “So buy gold and silver, you morons! Gold and silver!”

I hope I did some good!

The Mogambo Guru
for The Daily Reckoning