Karl Marx Moving Into Gracie Mansion

In the old days, The City didn’t sleep because there was so much to do. Nowadays, it doesn’t sleep because it’s worried about how to pay its bills.

Libertarians and economists of the Austrian School variety are wont to say, “Capitalism’s profits pay for socialism’s follies.”

But let’s get off our high horses for a moment and consider this: New York City housing has become so unaffordable for today’s early twentysomethings that a Muslim socialist just became the Democratic nominee for the New York mayorship this November.

This, despite 9/11, which happened before many of them were born. This, despite having a rudimentary understanding of economics. This, despite many of New York’s struggling class coming from countries with that ruinous economic system.

Stopping the Pain

Alfred Pennyworth, Bruce Wayne’s butler, said to Wayne in The Dark Knight, “You squeezed them. You hammered them to the point of desperation. And in their desperation, they turned to a man they didn’t fully understand.”

Of course, Alfred was talking about how the mob turned to the Joker for help in defeating Batman. But what if the “You” is New York’s unabashed, unashamed, and insufferable wealthy? No matter how many Charity Industrial Complex balls they attend, prices haven’t gone down in the Big Apple.

The “they” are the kids who can’t get started pursuing their dreams, let alone buying a car or a house one day.

Adults are remarkably adept at managing pain. They simply stop doing whatever is causing the pain. This time, they stopped voting for overgrown nepobaby and granny-killer Andrew Cuomo and voted for a man who’s only been an American citizen for six years.

Ok, let’s take a deep breath.

Because, as plausible as the above scenario sounds, this isn’t what happened at all.

Why the Rich Voted for a Socialist

I couldn’t believe my eyes when my good friend and colleague Greg Guenthner showed me the voting breakdown.

Let’s be clear: Zohran Mamdani didn’t win despite his socialist label.

He won because of it.

According to the Yale Youth Poll, Mamdani beat Cuomo by 20 points among voters earning more than $100,000 a year.

The poor and struggling didn’t vote for Mamdani. The rich voted for him.

That’s right. Six-figure professionals, living in rent-stabilized brownstones with high-speed Wi-Fi and low-voltage guilt, delivered a socialist candidate for November’s election.

Meanwhile, Cuomo dominated among the city’s poor, holding a 34-point lead among voters making under $50K.

Up is down. Black is white. And the socialist is now the candidate of the bourgeoisie.

However, it makes sense when you look more closely.

The Luxury of Guilt

Rich progressives love redistribution—so long as it’s theory. Higher taxes? Sure. They’ve got tax lawyers. Rent caps? Fine—they already own. Police defunding? Let’s try it—just not in their zip code.

It’s virtue signaling with a voting booth. Support the revolution—without ever leaving your wine bar.

Cultural Capital > Financial Capital

This isn’t about wealth. It’s about vibes.

Mamdani is young, brown, Muslim, artistic, intellectual, and radically anti-establishment. Voting for him is like putting a Black Lives Matter sign in your yard or a Palestine flag in your Instagram bio: moral superiority with zero real-world cost.

Cuomo Is the Past

Mamdani voters weren’t just voting for him. They were voting against Cuomo.

Against machine politics. Against backroom deals. Against the stench of scandal and arrogance.

They didn’t want stability. They wanted rupture.

And they got it.

So What Happens If He Governs?

It’s one thing to win a primary. Now, Mamdani’s got to win the election. But let’s just pretend he does. How would he run the city?

If Mamdani survives the brass knuckle fights to come—and believe me, the NYPD, real estate, and Wall Street aren’t going down quietly—here’s what we might see:

A Real Estate Rumble

Rent controls expand. Evictions slow. Luxury towers face new taxes. Developers panic. Tenants cheer. And the city’s housing stock? We’ll see.

Defunding, Reimagining, Reallocating

The NYPD will be the first institution on the chopping block. Expect public battles, national headlines, and a mayor who wears protests as campaign badges.

Austerity Meets Ideology

Balancing budgets while promising free stuff isn’t easy. But Mamdani may try. He’ll slash corporate tax breaks, fight Albany for more funding, and likely burn a few bridges with centrist Democrats.

A National Flashpoint

Make no mistake—this will be closely watched. Republicans will weaponize every misstep. Loony leftists will lionize every success. Either way, NYC becomes ground zero in America’s ideological civil war.

What This Means for the Rest of America

Mamdani’s win isn’t a local oddity. It’s a political seismic event.

The Great Class Reversal

Cuomo crushed among people with low incomes. Mamdani dominated among the rich. That flips the old Democratic coalition on its head.

The working class is drifting right into Trump’s arms. The elite-educated class is drifting left into Marx’s playbook. What unites them? Hatred of the middle.

Urban Socialism Is Now on the Menu

If Mamdani keeps the lights on, progressives will run with this playbook in Chicago, Boston, LA, and beyond.

If he tanks? You can expect a Rudy Giuliani-style backlash. But louder. And faster.

Politics Is Now Performance Art

Mamdani’s campaign was a symbolic war against the status quo. Today’s left doesn’t organize labor. It organizes narratives.

And that’s why wealthy, well-fed urbanites feel perfectly comfortable voting for a candidate whose policies might, in theory, hurt their pocketbooks.

Because in 2025, feeling good beats doing good.

Wrap Up

Zohran Mamdani may soon be the mayor of America’s largest city. And he’ll enter office backed by people who don’t need his policies—and opposed by the very people he claims to serve.

That contradiction isn’t a bug.

It’s the new blueprint.

And if it works, the rest of the country had better buckle up.

Because the socialist class war is no longer coming from below.

It’s coming from the top floor of a Brooklyn brownstone, with a reclaimed wood table, a $300 espresso machine, and a “tax the rich” bumper sticker on a Tesla parked outside.

Welcome to the revolution, brought to you by people who can afford it.